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Varc's Ex Files
Season 2, File 3

An advert will be appearing in the Crawley Evening News this week for "Experienced Glaziers". Unemployment statistics are about to take a marked downturn whilst at the same time the housewives of Aylesbury will be breathing a sigh of relief...
 

An advert will be appearing in the Crawley Evening News this week for "Experienced Glaziers". Unemployment statistics are about to take a marked downturn whilst at the same time the housewives of Aylesbury will be breathing a sigh of relief because this week non-league rent-a-hoof Karl Ready has signed a years contract with Crawley Town.

He played his first game against Tiverton Town on Saturday. You don't need to be Mystic Meg to work out what happened in the match. Obviously the defence leaked goals, but one of them was a penalty given away by you know who for an elbow (presumably as he was beaten for pace!). The final score was 2-2 as Crawley squandered a 2 goal lead, but to be fair to Karl, he doesn't give up easily, and hopefully he can help his new team get promoted to the Conference this season.

One time partner to Karl in the QPR "Slice Boys" was Tony Scully. The master of the miss hit cross has signed for Dagenham and Redbridge in the Conference. Rumour is, sales of the new kevlar replica shirts have risen. With Scully on one side of the pitch and Paul Bruce on the other, orders would have gone up after a few minutes on Saturday when Scully reportedly screwed his first effort in a Daggers shirt high over the bar! The game ended 1-1.

Also making the news again this week is Leroy "Tyson" Griffiths. Accusations are flying from Exeter City's ranks about an alleged incident that occurred in last weekend's game. Defender Alex Jeannin is claiming Leroy was feeling a bit peckish during the match and took a chunk out of his cheek! Jeannin got sent off for his reaction and has since involved the police and the FA so the story is set to continue. I know we all used to say we wished Leroy would put some "bite" into his performances in the hoops, but this is really taking things too far!

Barry Town of the JT Hughes Mitsubishi Welsh Premier League have recently undergone a lot of troubles off the field. After some disastrous management they have revealed they are over £1m in debt and almost going out of business. The Welsh double holders have had to release half the playing staff, take a new manager and turn semi-professional.

To make up the numbers they have signed seven new players, and one of those going on loan caught my eye. The young Ben Jones has signed from Merthyr Tydfil. This interests me because he was publicly heralded as the next big thing coming to trial at QPR, and in a summer visit to the training ground, I can confirm he was indeed there and involved in training. So, unless there are two Ben Jones', I can only assume, he has gone and, disappointingly, not made the cut.

Ben Walshe this week became the latest QPR player to begin a loan period in non-league. Hopefully, as with many other players, he will learn from it and come back with a fire in his belly and a will to succeed. The talented left winger played his first game for Gravesend and Northfleet at Scarborough on Saturday but ended up on the losing team.

Ben may feel a little awkward though as he finds himself teaming up with one of the victims of the latest Rangers clearout, Patrick Gradley. I imagine they will have plenty to talk about! Patrick has made a fairly quiet impression at Gravesend, but Walshie made many runs down the left including a pin point cross met on the volley by the striker Haworth, but sadly this, their best chance, hit the cross bar.

Rounding things up, a clean sheet at last for Plummer and Maddix at Barnet! The pairing kept out Accrington Stanley, but only managed a 0-0 draw.

Danny Murphy had a good game at Harrow Borough, hitting the bar in the 85th minute as they drew 1-1 with the Ernie Howe managed Basingstoke.

Nikki Bull and Aldershot slumped to a 2-0 defeat at Morecambe. Bull only returned to the side this weekend after a "set to" in the changing rooms on bank holiday Monday. Whatever happened led the manager to sub him at half time that day, but it seems he's back in the good books again now.

And finally, one time goal scoring prodigy Bertie Brayley has popped up again on loan from Canvey Island at Heybridge Swifts. He earned the Swifts a point by heading home in the 21st minute.

That's all this week. Any information about players can be sent to me on the address below, but remember, they must be crappy enough to have sunk to non-league level!

varc@qprnet.com